Awful Mr. Chow

Whatever you do, do not seat Lee Klein next to Mr. Chow at your next dinner party. Or, rather, do not sit Lee Klein at Mr. Chow because, well, he hates the place. And it never stood a chance. "Waiters at Mr. Chow in SoBe's W Hotel employ a different gimmick to demean diners," an already appalled Klein says in the first line of his review. "It's called the prix fixe menu. This is how it works: We the guests, enter the restaurant expecting a classy, high-end Chinese dinner." After giving props to the look of the place, Klein explains the back and forth banter between he and his hard selling waiter, saying "The most astonishing part of this exchange was that it was not a matter of one obnoxious waiter. Other servers around the room made the same persistent pitch, and we were subjected to a rerun on a return visit." Klein wasn't having any of it, saying "Regardless of the setting, to make diners feel foolish because of their choice is outrageous." And about those choices.....

Klein's observations on the food:
·Food comes out fast. "McDonald's ought to study these systems here so it can get burgers out faster."
·Mr. Chow noodles were "slippery" and tasted like Chef Boyardee. "Unremarkable hand-pulled rice noodles beneath a chopped meat sauce that was the most Bolognese-like dish you'll see in an Asian eatery."
·Crispy Beef should be renamed Chewy Beef: "Crunchy squiggles of fried, battered meat glazed in a gloppy sweet/sour sauce. The meat got chewier, the sauce gooier, with each passing moment."
·Green Shrimp are like Green M&M's but not as good: "Green shrimp, a house specialty, apparently gets its color and flavor from green food dye."

And it gets worse. And worse. Bottom line from Klein? "Everything about Mr. Chow is awful." [Miami New Times]